


I Will Love You Forever

by SavannahStrawberry



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, F/M, Healthy Relationships, Hurt/Comfort, Jealousy, Minor Character Death, Pining, Pregnancy, Qui-Gon Jinn Lives, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-02
Updated: 2020-06-27
Packaged: 2020-07-29 13:08:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 17,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20082715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SavannahStrawberry/pseuds/SavannahStrawberry
Summary: Padme and Obi-Wan are in love, and now she carries his child.Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan chose not to take Anakin from his life on Tattooine, changing the destiny of everyone in the process.





	1. Chapter 1

Padme rested on the couch on her balcony. Although it was quite a different view from Naboo, she enjoyed spending the few moments she had away from being Senator to watch the city. Rubbing her palm over her belly , she could feel a small bump forming. It was very comforting. Closing her eyes, she tried clearing her mind. Stress and anxiety came with being Queen at such a young age, and then becoming a Senator directly afterwards. She wouldn’t change it for the world. She would never abandon her people. She thought of the first time Obi-Wan tried teaching her how to meditate. 

“Obi....” She said smiling, remembering how patient he was, touching his mind to hers. Her comlink lit up, she answered sweetly, “Senator Amidala speaking.” 

“Hello there darling”, the crisp Coruscanti accent responded warmly. She felt a buzz of excitement at the sound of his voice, although laced with uncertainty. 

“I love hearing your voice again, how was the mission?” 

“You know the Council, always sending me to the front line or to the front of the negotiating table.” 

“Which was it this time? I wish we could have met once before you left. ” Padme knew their relationship wasn’t traditional. They both held dangerous jobs, she didn’t worry when they initially were together. Now as the fighting among Senators escalated, so did the war. 

“Table talk, although it was on a sandy planet on the outer rim. Right in the middle of a dual dust and sand storm.” Obi-Wan said, faking exasperation. 

“Let me guess, you took a ship without a shower on board.” Padme teased. 

“Something like that.” 

The silence that fell between them was comfortable, they had been together through countless missions and dangerous Senator meetings. Nothing was off limits or considered an awkward topic. Although as she felt her baby bump, she was afraid that it would push Obi-Wan away. What if he didn’t want to be a father? They were not married , they didn’t live together. Sure, the man stayed at her place 9/10 times he was on the planet, but did that really mean that he was ready for the next step? 

“Obi, come see me tonight after you get settled. I”, she paused, “I want to talk to you about something.” 

He could feel the hesitation in her voice, it concerned him slightly. “I never refuse an invitation.” Obi-Wan answered back cheekily. She felt her face flush a little, but then her handmaiden came to address her. Turning her comlink off , she turned to her friend. 

“Yes Mina?” she asked. 

“My lady, Senator Onaconda Far would like to speak to you about the Geonosian bill soon.” 

“Of course, please tell him I’ll be there right away.” 

\----

Embracing her Uncle, she thanked him for inviting her to review the bill after she expressed her concern during a preliminary meeting. Glancing out the window, she realized it was dusk and wondered if Obi-wan was waiting for her. 

Entering her chambers , the lights were dimmed and she wondered if Mina was still here. 

“Mina?” She called out. Suddenly strong arms wrapped around her waist making her jump, “Ah! Obi-Wan you scared me.” She laughed, turning around to look at the Jedi. 

“My deepest apologies, I’m afraid I told your handmaiden that I had to meet with you, and that I could fulfill her duties for tonight.” He smiled, stroking her hair, still expertly done up for Senate meetings. She led him to the couch, he sat in the nook, with her infront of him. 

“Are you sure you’re up to the challenge?” She said softly, with a hint of tease. She felt his fingers gently start to unbraid her hair. 

“I’m a fast learner,” he responded, having seen Mina help Padme other times. Getting through the last of her braids, he combed his hand through her now soft, wavy dark hair. He loved the way it contrasted to her light skin, unlike his own sun bleached auburn hair. Turning towards the Jedi, Padme thought of their baby, and took his hand. 

“Something has happened Obi-Wan, something wonderful.” She smiled hesitantly, looking into his blue eyes, calm as always. He squeezed her hand in reassurance. 

“What is it?” He pressed. She looked down, unsure, and took a breath. 

“I’m pregnant.” She announced, and felt his hand slip away from hers. 

“Oh Padme…” Obi-Wan said softly, overwhelmed with emotion. Unable to express how he felt in words he touched his mind to hers, projecting his love and pleasure at hearing her news. He pressed his palm to her small bump, feeling their child. “I love you so much.” Padme teared up, feeling the rush of emotions and Obi-Wan’s passionate confession. Snuggling into his side she placed her hand on top of his. Tilting her head slightly she pressed her lips to his, her other hand stroking his recently shaven cheek and his soft hair. She pulled back, panting slightly, resting her forehead on his. 

“Obi… What will we do?” She questioned. 

“I’ll do anything for you, Padme.” He responded sincerely, his gaze unwavering. “Let’s get married.” 

Shocked, Padme projected her happiness, telling the man she loved, “Yes”. 

Their minds melded together in their strong emotions, holding each other as feelings of passion, sincerity, and pleasure flowed between them. 

_ “I will love you forever, Padme.”  _

_ “I will love you forever, Obi.” _


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now married, Obi-Wan struggles with visions that plague his dreams.

Waking up alone on his ship, sweat glistening on his skin, he contemplates the events that the Force revealed to him while he slept. This was not the way Obi-Wan wanted his day to start. Night after night, the Jedi witnessed visions of fire. Smoke clouding his vision, screams piercing his ears. He moved to the small water closet, splashing his face, trying to forget the terrible sights and sounds which plagued him. The man who stared back at him in the mirror was not the confident, quick thinking Jedi Knight that he often is. It was if all his insecurities shined back at him clearly, brought out by the heavy vision. Finding comfort in the soft hum of the ship, he brought a hand up to focus on his face, and noticed he’s grown a bit of stubble. Picking up the standard razor, he willed his hand to steady, moving on with his morning routine. 

In the pilot seat, Obi-Wan rubbed a hand over his face, feeling drained. 

“Should I share these visions with the council?” The Jedi Knight questioned himself. Putting the ship on autopilot after he engaged the hyperdrive, he looked lovingly at the small photo he had placed on the dash. Padme stood, elegant as ever, their arms around each other on her home planet, Naboo. At first Obi-Wan rejected the idea of having photographs taken at their wedding, but he’s very grateful for Padme’s closest friends and family’s insistence .The warm scenery took him away from the cold , sterile ship environment, even just for a moment. 

Entering Coresaunt’s atmosphere, Obi-Wan put the photo snuggly in a small pocket in the front of his robes, and prepared the rest of his things for landing. 

\----

“Master, could I speak with you? It’s with the most importance.” Obi-Wan asked through the door to his old Master’s , Qui-Gon Jinn, quarters. The door opened swiftly, letting the younger Jedi into the living space of a Jedi Master. Much larger than his own Knight’s quarters, it was fit to hold both a Master and Padawan. Obi-Wan used to live here, but felt no remorse at moving into his new quarters after his knighting since he had already been spending a portion of his time at Padme’s . Qui-Jon sat on the floor, looking to be in the middle of a meditation. “I’m sorry to disturb you, Master.” 

“You are always welcome, my old Padawan”. Qui-Gon stated warmly, opening his eyes. “Something is troubling you?” 

Obi-Wan hated lying to his master, but he kept his shields up. After officially deciding to dedicate himself to Padme, he felt that he must now place a barrier between those he once opened his mind freely too. With a sad smile, he joined his master on the floor, sitting in a meditating style across from him. “Visions I have been having at night, they are very concerning to me. Although the... content of these visions makes me afraid to tell even the Grandmasters.” Obi-Wan confided in his mentor, hesitantly. 

“Hm…” Qui-Gon closed his eyes, thinking. “The events you see in your dreams may be certain to come to pass... or not. The Force is sharing with you for a reason Obi-Wan. It is your decision that will influence what will come to pass, but remember my old Padawan, doing nothing is a decision as well.” Obi-Wan could sense his master was referring to his persistence to leave the boy on Tatooine behind, not try for his freedom. 

“I felt darkness surrounding him, please trust in my judgement.” Obi-Wan pleaded, unsure if he truly did make the right decision. His Master’s eyes fell upon him again, and the guilt rose slightly inside him. 

“That darkness you felt, was it the same darkness you feel now in your visions?” His Master questioned, his brows furrowing in concern. 

“No, this feels… different. When I was around Anakin, I felt the darkness almost as it came off of him in small, subtle waves. Now it’s… like it’s constantly pounding in my head.” Obi-Wan realized. He released his feelings of worry into the Force, not willing to show his Master how much it concerned him. 

“Changed his fate, you may have by not taking him with us, but all of ours you have changed as well.” Qui-Jon concluded solemnly. “I advise you to meditate more on these visions, try to find the origin of the darkness, search for the feeling you felt when next to Anakin”. 

“Yes, Master.” Obi-Wan stood and bowed, leaving the quarters. Returning to his own he freshened up, before heading out to his speeder and making his way to his favorite Senator’s apartment. 

\---

“Obi-Wan!” Padme said in delight as her husband walked into the sitting room. He gave her a small kiss, a hand around her waist, before giving a bow to Senator Farr. “I was just discussing the future with Uncle, he sees much promise in the younger members of his family. Is that not delightful?” She said happily, a hand on her bump. The mention of the future was not what Obi-Wan wanted to think about, all he felt in the future was smoke, and that he was suffocating. 

“I’m sure,” Obi-Wan forced a smile, “Would you like to go out tonight?” He asked Padme. 

“What place do you have in mind?” Farr asked, smiling sarcastically, batting his galaxy eyes. 

“No disrespect Senator, but I’d like some time with my wife, since I recently returned from a long and very strenuous mission”. Obi-Wan shifted closer to Padme, unconsciously seeking comfort since he was quite emotionally exhausted. Little did Farr know, Obi-Wan was on a simple scouting mission. Padme rolled her eyes at him knowingly. He winked back at her. 

“Just this time Kenobi, remember I still owe you a drink for helping me on that speech.” Farr responded. 

“How could I forget! I still need to beat you in a round of Dejarik. You owe me a drink but I owe five already from that blasted game.” Obi-Wan joked. The Senator hugged Padme goodbye, and soon the couple were left alone. Padme turned to Obi-Wan, tracing the outline of his Jedi issued robes.

“So, where are we going?” 

“I was thinking our cottage on Naboo, lets release some of that tension from sitting in boring Senate meetings all day.” Obi-Wan joked, rubbing her shoulders, understanding the vital importance of her work. Padme laughed. 

“You never fail to entertain me, but this time I pilot,” Obi-Wan started to protest. “No! Every time you pilot, let me enjoy the excitement for once,” Padme declared, racing towards the box she keeps her keys. “And, if someone tries to attack us on land, I’ll expertly pilot us away in our speeder as you deflect lasers with your lightsaber.” She joked, mimicking Obi-Wan’s serious face, pretending to have a lightsaber clutched in her hands, deflecting blaster shots. 

“Ah.... the real intention is revealed, you want to accept my offer to train in wielding a lightsaber.” Obi-Wan said grinning, moving into a hand-to-hand combat stance as if for her to defend herself with the pretend saber.

“Maybe , if I wasn’t already so handy with a blaster.” She smirked back, hand on her sleek white blaster, cocking her hip a bit, showing it off. Obi-Wan trailed his eyes lazily from her caramel one’s to her hip. 

“I think it would be better if we waited for baby as well,” he chuckled, rubbing her bump. “Have you felt him or her move yet?” 

“No, but sometimes I can feel the presence, like it’s reaching out. Maybe I’m just imagining,” She wondered suddenly, “ do you want our baby to be Force sensitive?” Obi-Wan wasn’t sure, he felt a flash of fear at the thought of their child being taken away to grow up at the temple. He instantly thought of his own parents, the ever persistent question in his mind, why did you leave me, still lingering from when he was a child. Padme sensed his emotions, and helped him will it away to the Force. 

“I’m not sure, I cannot imagine myself without the Force, but I do not see you any less by not having it.” Obi-Wan told her sincerely. “I would not want to change who you are, or how our baby will be.” 

“I agree,” Padme told him warmly, “I would not change who you are for the world.” She kissed him deeply, projecting pleasure and safety. “Shall we leave now?” Obi-Wan looked at her heatedly. 

“Definitely.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I enjoyed continuing this, I believe I'll make it into a multi-part story. 
> 
> Thoughts on this chapter?


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Padme and Obi-Wan at their cottage on Naboo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notice rating has changed.

“Did I ever tell you how beautiful you are?” Obi-Wan smiled with a warmth in his eyes, laying on his side, hand resting on his head. The bright summer sun of Naboo shone down on the field where the couple lay. Onlookers would not be able to tell that there in the scatter of wildflowers lay a Jedi, and a Senator. Padme, dressed in a minimally pink laced, almost cream colored regency style dress that ended at her knees, sat cross legged next to him.

“Hm… I’m not sure if I recall.” Padme joked, playing with the grass. Obi-Wan took her hand, pressing it his lips to kiss, looking up at her longingly. Whenever he looked at her that way Padme felt like melting. Obi-Wan rolled over on his back, and she leaned over to meet his lips with hers. She intertwined their fingers together, pressing him into the soft ground. 

Wearing a light tunic that mimicked the Jedi style, a personal touch by her seamstress, Padme could feel the heat radiating off of him, as well as through their bond. Obi-Wan rolled them over gently, mouthing the smooth skin beneath her jaw. Padme unlaced the simple tie that held Obi-Wan’s shirt together, slipping her hands under the thin material. She spread her thighs, desire growing inside her. 

The Jedi worked his way down her chest, kissing the space between her breasts, her growing bump, now about four months along, before stopping at her hips. Padme watched him patiently, her skin becoming more sensitive as he palmed his way up her thighs, pushing up her dress as he went. Clutching the material, he lay his head on the soft skin on the inside of her thigh, kissing it slightly, before looking up at her, blue eyes asking for permission. 

“Please Obi…” Padme asked longingly, projecting her want towards him, feeling a buzz of affection radiating back to her. Obi-Wan closed his eyes and pressed his lips to the silk fabric, before sliding the material down her legs to rest discarded in the grass beside them, forgotten. Pressing himself to her, he nuzzled the soft hair, slipping his tongue between her folds. Padme gave a small sound of pleasure, running her hand through his hair, sometimes gripping the back of his head when the man flicked his tongue just right against her small bud. Her thighs began to shake as Obi-Wan switched from his more long, teasing motion to a more aggressive assault. Flushed , Padme whined his name, arching her back in delight. “Ah! Right there.” She moaned, Obi-Wan held her tight against him, hands on the thighs wrapped around his shoulders. The pleasure building inside her overflowed, pulsing through her body and flooding her mind. 

“Padme!” Obi-Wan gasped breathing heavy, feeling euphoric, her pleasure flowing through him. Rolling on his back next to her, she stared up at the clouds, a rare sight on Coruscant, always bustling with new industrial growth, she missed the simple nature of her home planet. 

“Let’s stay here for awhile.” Padme announced still panting slightly, wanting to preserve this happiness as long as possible. Obi-Wan thought for a second, watching a pack of birds fly by, high in the sky. 

“The council requests my presence tomorrow, Padme.” He reveals reluctantly, but adds, “I want to raise our child here. Away from all the chaos on Coruscant.” He rubbing his hand on her bump.  _ Safe.  _

“I am planning on not running during the next election cycle,” Padme tells him, “I know that the candidates who are running are of true heart. I trust them to make the best decisions for Naboo.” Padme stands now, dusting herself off, slipping her underwear back on, fixing her hair slightly. Obi-Wan stands as well, fixing his shirt. 

“I like your hair a bit wild.” He flirts, running his hand through, releasing the loose braiding. 

“I wouldn’t mind you a bit rough around the edges as well.” Padme grins, stroking his smooth cheek with the back of her hand. The sky had started to turn a soft orange, “Let’s head back.” Walking through the grass , Obi-Wan admired her before joining the journey back. 

“I want to be here with you, but I don’t know how to get away from the council’s persisting meetings and missions.” He told her, rolling ideas around in his head. “As Jedi, we aren’t allowed personal leave.”  _ Because we aren’t allowed to have personal lives _ . He felt a spike of anger, which he quickly willed away to the Force. 

“I hope you don’t find my question silly, but I noticed you have been at odds with the counsel lately. Would you ever consider leaving?” She asked hesitantly, knowing well that she’s talking about leaving the life he’s only grown to known. 

“I’m not sure, I have never known of anyone leaving the order.”  _ I’m not sure it would be wise to leave now, after these visions.  _ Obi-Wan thought. Crossing the shallow river, they approached the steps to the cottage. 

“Shall we meditate together?” Padme suggested. Obi-wan gave her a small smile, although she is not a Jedi, Padme picked up meditating quite easily from his teachings. Obi-Wan remembered it being something more difficult for him to learn. But now, he enjoys the time spent meditating with his wife, sharing emotions with her. He is not able to project images to her like he had with Qui-Gon, but he’s never had such a strong connection with someone as he does with Padme. 

Back in their small house, Obi-Wan cleared the floor of the sitting room. To the side of the room was an open kitchen , and to the back of the cottage was a bedroom, and a wash closet. Small table and chairs moved aside, they sat cross legged across from each other, knees touching. Closing their eyes, they synchronized their breathing, hands holding each, relaxed.

Obi-Wan started to feel warm, his feet burned.  _ Fire engulfed the walls, unnatural fire. Hearing cries, Obi-Wan went into the room in front of him. Preparing to face a child, he was instead met with a pair of golden eyes- _

His own eyes snapped open, releasing the tension in his body he didn’t know he was holding. Padme looked at him questioning, wanting to know what was making him feel distressed. Obi-Wan removed his hands from her, getting up and moving towards the window, watching the faint outline of the grass flow in the moonlight. He felt gentle arms around his waist, as Padme leaned against him from behind. 

“It’s late, lets go to bed.” Padme mumbled into his back. She could feel Obi-Wan’s troubled emotions. “Can you do something for me?” Padme asked, Obi-Wan turned to look into her chestnut eyes. “When I was still Queen, I was worried constantly about being attacked. It would drive my decisions, I didn’t allow myself to focus on what was actually happening. Happening  _ here _ , and  _ now _ . I ask of you to do the same. Here we are on Naboo, it’s serene , warm, we are together and share this miracle.” Padme held her baby bump, hoping Obi-Wan will be able to find happiness in her words. 

“Yes, Padme.” Obi-Wan said tiredly, believing in her words. “I love you and our child more than anything.” He took a long look again at the moonlit field before following her to bed. 

_ I’m never going back.  _


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two months later, Padme and Obi-Wan get an unexpected visit from a friend.

Obi-Wan noticed something different as he returned home on his speeder, recently bought supplies in the back. Next to his cottage he shared with his wife was a small ship. Not just any ship, it was the one that belonged to his old Master, Qui-Gon. Unsure if his visit was meant to be a happy one, Obi-Wan was hesitant to see his past mentor. He didn’t give him or the council notice that he would not be returning to the Jedi Temple.

Parking his speeder, Obi-Wan started unpacking the supplies.The cottage was only occupied as a vacation home before, so it lacked any materials for a workshop. Since the nearest village was a 40 minute speeder ride away, and the palace itself, where Padme still held a room, was an hour and a half, Obi-Wan wanted to be able to sow a garden. Obi-Wan didn’t mind living this more rural lifestyle. As Jedi, he valued living simply. It helped clear his mind, compared to the noisiness of the city. Here he truly felt that Padme could be safe. Even so, he felt a bit insecure leaving her at home, and made sure not to spend any unnecessary time in the town. Dropping the crates of supplies next to the building, he walked inside. Sensing a wave of calm from his wife, he knew that everything was fine so far. 

“Ah, Obi-Wan.” Qui-Gon said warmly, happy to see his past apprentice after 2 months of silence. “I just arrived a second ago.” 

“ _ Does he know about us? Or our baby?”  _ Obi-Wan asked Padme, joining them at the table. 

“ _ I’m sure its obvious,”  _ she responds, very visibly pregnant. “ _ Although he hasn’t asked a thing yet _ .” 

“I’m glad to see you, what is the purpose of your visit my friend?” Obi-Wan asked him, trying not to come across as annoyed. He wasn’t upset to see his Master, but he did worry that the peace they had been enjoying will soon be disrupted. 

“The council needs an update report from you,” Qui-Gon started, holding up a hand when Obi-Wan started to speak. “I have been able to stall for you this long, but they are worried that you are... falling.” Silence fell upon the trio, an uneasiness settling into the air. 

“ _ Falling? _ ” Padme questioned Obi-Wan, giving him a concerned look. He looked back to reassure her, but also to reassure himself. 

“I understand going off the radar would garner concern, but falling? Really?” Obi-Wan pressed, leaning on the table. 

“With your sudden disappearance after your confession to me, I thought for sure you were in danger.” Qui-Gon iterated convincingly. “Falling was only mentioned briefly, unfortunately the reference created a seed that quickly grew within the thoughts of the council.” 

“You told the council about my visions?” Obi-Wan said with a growl, not understanding why his Master would betray him in this way. 

“Obi-Wan please understand, I did what I thought was best. I felt your distress through the Force.” He said, referring to Obi-Wan’s meditation sessions. “I never imagined that this would be the situation I would find.” Padme looked between the men, unsure. “I’m sure if you returned to the council explaining that the Senator requested for a personal, discreet, guard during her pregnancy they would understand why you did not communicate. You have been assigned to protect Senator Amidala in the past.”Qui-Gon concluded. Turning towards Padme, he added, “my congratulations, Senator.” 

“Thank you Qui-Gon, I’ve always appreciated the Jedi’s assistance.” She put carefully. “ _ Are we really keeping this a secret from your Master?”  _

“ _ He already told the Council about my visions Padme, they will definitely declare me a threat if they knew I broke the code.”  _ Pausing, he added, “ _ do know wonder why you never hear about rogue Jedi?”  _

_ _ “When is the Council expecting me?” Obi-Wan asked his old Master. 

“As soon as possible, actually they requested I bring you back if I was correctly predicted your location.” Obi-Wan felt a chill at Qui-Gon words. 

“I would of course, but now you see that I must protect Senator Amidala, and she is not in a stable condition for space travel.” Obi-Wan lied through his teeth, with his usual charming smile. 

“I agree, I shall stay with the Senator while you visit the Temple.” Qui-Gon declared, having also worked with her in the past, he felt that he would be a suitable substitute in Obi-Wan’s absence. Feeling a rush of emotions, Obi-Wan quickly threw his shields up, and stood from the table. 

“...please allow me to gather my belongings.” Obi-Wan stated as clearly as he could, turning away from his Master and wife, to hide his face from them. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he went outside. Going to his speeder, he stared at the dash, taking a deep breath.  _ There is no emotion.  _ Parking in less chaotic way than he initially had a couple minutes ago, the Jedi Knight moved the supplies inside, feeling frustration boil inside him, the scraps and tools representing the life he was beginning to build. He couldn’t look at Padme as he moved to their bedroom to gather his belongings, careful to shut the door behind him. Evidence of their not so innocent life together was scattered about the cottage. If his Master asks why his clothes were in Padme’s room, he’ll brush it off as a storage solution. He could hear Padme’s and Qui-Gon’s muffled voices in the other room, light and happy. He knew if he opened the bond that he and Padme shared he would feel the same anguish from here that he felt now. Luckily, both politician and Jedi were skilled in the art of deception. Stripping out of his civilian attire, Obi-Wan robotically dressed in the Jedi uniform left folded neatly in the dresser. About to leave he noticed the photo on the nightstand.  _ You’ve been through many journeys with me, haven’t you.  _ He thought sadly. About to take it with him, he instead took it out of the frame, and slipped it inside the book Padme was currently reading. 

\------

  
  


“Obi-Wan!” Padme mouthed running up to him, tears forming in her eyes as she saw her husband, no longer dressed in his light Naboo clothes, heading towards Qui-Gon’s ship solemnly. Throwing her arms around him, she held him close, head buried in his chest. “Please return to me.” She said, the words muffled by the fabric. Kissing her forehead, Obi-Wan had a pained expression. Although Padme’s emotions flowed freely, the years of Jedi training helped him to put up a wall all around his mind, forcing his emotions to the farthest corner. Holding each other for a moment, Obi-Wan pulled back first, looking at Padme deeply, brows furrowed slightly, determination set in his features. 

“I will always return to you,” he stated, “for without you, I truly am lost.” 

Padme gave him a final, passionate kiss before watching the Jedi Knight start up the ship, and lift off into the distance, past the mountains and into the stars. Padme wiped her tears , arms cradling herself. Naboo never felt so cold. 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Obi-Wan meets with the council, uncertain about his future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is twice as long as the others, but I felt that it worked best not split into two parts.

“We sense conflict within you, Knight Kenobi.” Master Shaak Ti explained thoughtfully. Obi-Wan stood before the council expressionless. 

“You are correct, Master.” He confirmed their beliefs, biting his lip nervously. 

“Is this conflict based on your blatant betrayal of our trust, by going on an unwarranted mission?” Mace jabbed. Obi-Wan felt small in the room of Masters, and decided to bare part of what troubled him. He admitted to himself that they are much wiser than he, guidance is what he needed. 

“No Master… conflicted I am over my decision to leave my report on Tatooine altered from the truth. I am deeply sorry, and I will accept which ever punishment the council deems suitable.” Obi-Wan purposefully directed the conversation away from his life on Naboo. He did not believe that the joy he shared with his wife was what was creating conflict within himself. Convinced that the decision on Tatooine is what was causing his visions, he focused on exploring the consequences of his actions. The uncertainty that surrounded his feelings towards Anakin could create consequences for the Jedi. “ _ Red eyes,”  _ Obi-Wan thought, the dark image seared into the back of his mind. 

“Tell us you will, what you discovered on Tatooine” Yoda asked curiously, taking an interest in Obi-Wan’s confession. Obi-Wan took a deep breath, then started to divulge the story about how Qui-Gon and him came across the chosen one. When he was done he felt drained. 

“Feel responsible you do, but still Padawan to Master Jinn, were you not?” Yoda said, “your judgement it might have been, but still at fault is Master Jinn, for not including in his own report.” 

Obi-Wan grew hesitant, he didn’t come here to taint his Master’s reputation. “I was insistent that the darkened aura that I felt surrounding the boy was a message of caution from the Force. Although, now I see clearly that bringing this matter to the council would have been the wiser decision.” Folding his arms, he awaited their comments. 

“Thank you Knight Kenobi, the council will now deliberate.” Shaak Ti mediated calmly. Obi-Wan sent his nervousness away into the Force as he bowed, leaving the council to to their decision. 

\---

“The council has decided that you will take Anakin as your unofficial Padawan learner. You both will be stationed in the Temple to meditate until future notice. Master Yoda will oversee your progress. This must be done as soon as possible, as the boy grows older” The council announced. It had been six years since he and his Master left Tatooine, Anakin was now a young man. 

“Understand this darkness, we shall.” Yoda concluded. 

“I will do as the council asks.” Obi-Wan responded, feeling more conflicted now than before. 

\---

“I have noticed that Obi-Wan has become quite taken by you, Senator.” Qui-Gon starts at dinner, “I understand how one could become accustomed to such quietness as this.” It’s been a week since the Jedi left for Coruscant, but Padme and the Master have grown into an easy pattern. 

“I have great respect for the both of you, during the short time we spent together on Naboo and Tatooine I became very confident in your abilities to protect me from assasination. I am glad now that Obi-Wan was able to enjoy a much needed break from the business of war, although I would not have requested he join me here without good reason,” Padme said thoughtfully. Only sixteen at the time of their guardianship, she greatly enjoyed the fatherly role Qui-Gon adopted, having a feeling that Obi-Wan felt similarly towards his Master. It was well known that Jedi were not supposed to have attachments, but here she saw something that she greatly missed, as she adopted an adult role earlier than most on Naboo.

It was until a few years later when Obi-Wan become a Jedi Knight, that he started to grow apart from Qui-Gon. Padme did not like to see their relationship become distant, but looking back, was happy that Obi-Wan’s new promotion allowed him the ability to have a  _ slight _ influence on which missions he embarked on. Remembering how he quickly chose to familiarize himself with the Senate, Padme felt butterflies in her stomach as she thought about the lingering looks, small touches that turning heated, formalities laced with desire. 

“I agree with you completely. Since attachments are… forbidden within the order, Jedi have failed to see at times how vital the gift of motherhood is.” Qui-Gon told her, he himself struggling with his attachments throughout his life. Since he often questioned the Jedi code, Qui-Gon would never achieve a standing on the council, even though he was most skilled in the living Force. He could sense the love radiating back and forth between Padme and her child, his brow raised slightly, surprised she has this much awareness in projecting her feelings. This child was much loved, and Qui-Gon felt confident that they had the power of great change stored inside, to be molded by Senator Amidala’s gentle, yet firm teachings. 

Suddenly, a feeling of dread overwhelmed Qui-Gon. Getting up suddenly from the dinner table, he closed his eyes , listening for a Force signature. Quiet at first, but becoming increasingly louder was an unstable, malicious darkness. Glancing back at the Senator, she looked at him worriedly, wondering what made him react so strongly. 

“Get your blaster .” Qui-Gon said swiftly, running out the front door, to be met with a dathmorthian calmly stalking towards the cottage from his speeder, the intent to kill radiating off of him in darkened waves. Qui-Gon demanded he stop, igniting his lightsaber, the green glow seeming bright now that it was dusk. Force pushed into the air, Qui-Gon landed on his back inside the cottage, a pained moan escaping his lips. Padme shot at the horned man, only to have it reflected back at her, grazing her leg. Crying out, she fell to the ground, scrambling towards her spare in the bedroom. The large man picked her up by her arm, throwing her against the wall to weaken her spirit. Not anticipating the strength the man held both physically and within the Force, Qui-Gon quickly gained his bearings, holding his up his saber last second as the horned man thrust his own down. Forcing the other off of him, Qui-Gon gained the upper hand, fighting the dathmorthian out of the cottage, away from the Senator. As their sabers flashed , the wooden door frame became singed, quickly starting to smoke. 

Snarling, the man unleashed the second blade on his dual saber, able to process his thoughts more clearly, the deadly red glow confirming the Jedi Master’s suspicion. 

_ The Sith have returned.  _

\---

On route to Tatooine, Obi-Wan called Padme through his comm, enjoying the personal time autopilot allowed him. “Senator Amidala, if you are unoccupied at the moment, I would love to hear how the switch in guard is suiting you.” He asked carefully, unsure if Qui-Gon or others were about. A couple moments passed and all he heard was static. An uneasy feeling pitted in his stomach, wondering if Padme had suffered a complication and was in the hospital. Deciding Anakin could wait a few hours, the boy wasn’t even expecting him, Obi-Wan changed his flight to Naboo. 

With his small , two person ship, he was able to land in the clearing next to their cottage. If he had been piloting Padme’s silver ship, he would have to take a long detour through the city. Seeing smoke before anything, Obi-Wan cursed, instantly reaching out for his bond with Padme. 

Hearing nothing, the Jedi Knight hazardously set the ship down , and jumped out of the cockpit, sprinting towards the building. Getting closer, he saw the clash of bright green and red. Tapping into the training bond that hadn’t been active for years, Obi-Wan felt Qui-Gon struggling to keep up with the Sith. 

_ “I’m here Master! Let’s fight him together!” _ Obi-Wan shouted through the bond. Emotions swelled up inside of him, as he used the Force to sprint faster, directing all his guilt and anguish into attacking the dathmorthian. 

_ “Yes, together.”  _ Qui-Gon projected back, filling with pride at the man his former Padawan had become.

Now defending himself against two Jedi, the horned man decided he needed to act fast. Force pushing the younger into the burning cottage, he was able to return to attacking the weakened Master.

Obi-Wan yelled in protest as he was forced away from Qui-Gon. Scrambling to his feet, he noticed Padme’s unconscious body lay discarded , fire licking the walls around her. Rage swiftly built inside him, as he cradled his lover. Taking her into his arms he brought her outside, away from the immediate danger. Setting her down in the grass quickly, Obi-Wan gripped his lightsaber, knuckles turning white as he charged the Sith, yelling through his pain at the thought of losing the two he held most dear. 

“How dare you!” Obi-Wan screamed at him, repeatedly slamming him lightsaber into the horned man’s defense, all thought on form lost. 

“How dare I? How dare you  _ filthy _ Jedi interfere with my mission. I will kill you and your Master, as well as my target.” The darthmorthian smirked, “I will find great pleasure in my first Jedi kill.” Taking advantage of Obi-Wan’s lack of form, he kicked him in the gut, making the young man stumble back with a grunt. Qui-Gon rushed the Sith now, but was forced back with a powerful wave of a hand. The older man didn’t stand back up. 

“I am Maul,” The horned man sneered, continuing his physical attack on the Knight, using the Force to snatch the young man’s lightsaber out of his hand placing it next to his own lightsaber on his belt, taunting the Jedi. Blood boiling, Obi-Wan held his arms up to defend himself, but the taller man grabbed him by the throat, throwing him against the side of his speeder, metal pressed hard into his back. The Jedi squirmed, blood getting in his eye. Maul pinned him, laughing at how weak he was, tightening his grip around Obi-Wan’s neck, digging his nails into his skin. 

“So much emotion for a Jedi, are you hiding that you have fallen?” Maul smiled knowingly. Obi-Wan choked for air beneath his hand, insecurity blossoming inside of him as he clawed at the arm holding him. With his other sharp hand, Maul pressed his thumb into the Jedi’s temple. “What do we have here…” 

Obi-Wan threw up his shields, only for them to be shattered by the dathmorthian’s assault. Rifling through his mind like a thief would a drawer, Maul found pleasure in what he saw. His Master would be most pleased. Pulling them back to reality, he felt like teasing the Knight more before he ended him. 

Throwing the struggling Jedi on the ground close to where the Senator lay, Obi-Wan coughed violently, clutching his throat as air returned to his lungs. “You failed, young Jedi,” Maul spoke as if disappointed. Obi-Wan struggled to stand, hatred flowing through him, standing in front of Padme as if to protect her. Maul began his final line with spite, “And now I will kill you and your precious Senator, just like I killed your pathetic spawn inside of her.” 

Obi-Wan’s world froze.

Harnessing the power of the Force around him, Obi-Wan screamed in anger as he held out both arms, picking Maul into the air, and then slamming him into the ground with a crunch. The darthmorthian gasped in surprise, as the Jedi Force pulled his lightsaber back to himself, standing over the Sith, hatred flowing through him as he sliced his torso in half. Maul’s face scrunched in pain mixed with shock. Obi-Wan kept attacking unrestrained, burning through skin, until Maul lay unrecognizable beneath him. Breathing heavily, staring at the misshapen darthmorthian, he placed his lightsaber on his belt, blood and sweat sliding down his neck. 

Qui-Gon sat beside Padme, checking her vitals, very beaten himself. “Obi-Wan we must get the Senator to the hospital,” his Master urged, distressed. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One Year Later.

Strong arms wrapped around her waist, head nuzzled in the crook of her neck, bodies pressed together. Padme stared tiredly at the holographic clock next to her bed.  _ “I wish I could stay here all day…”  _ She thought absently as she pulled away from Obi-Wan to sit on the edge of the bed. Glancing back at her husband, she smiled sadly at his sleeping form, happy that at least in sleep he could find peace. Things haven’t been easy for them since Naboo. Almost fully healed from the Sith’s attack , Padme had returned to Coruscant to rejoin the election candidates for Senator. 

Dressed in her silk nightgown, she left the bedroom to call upon her new handmaiden, Nalia, to help her dress. Working in silence, Nalia expertly weaved and braided Padme’s hair to the most modern style. Sunlight started to slip through the windows, jagged from the many buildings that dotted the skyline. Padme watched the morning cars zip by, trying to clear her mind. 

Feeling Obi-Wan’s wakening Force presence, she clung to it. Even though she was surrounded by friends and family, Padme constantly felt as if a blanket of sadness covered her. Sometimes it was suffocating.

Obi-Wan felt these small waves, constantly responding back with feelings of love. He knew it wasn’t enough, but didn’t know what else to do. Each day he trains with Anakin, admittedly focusing on more physical lessons than mental.

_ “I’ll never fail you again.” _ Obi-Wan promised her the moment she woke at the hospital in Naboo a year ago. Emerging from the bedroom, now dressed in his Jedi uniform, Obi-Wan approached the Senator. Caressing her cheek, he pressed a kiss to her soft skin. No words were spoken as he left the apartment, needing to get back to the Jedi Temple before Anakin did something unwise. Padme watched the man leave, wondering solemnly how they could return to before, a relationship not riddled with guilt and regret. 

\---

“Faster Anakin!” Obi-Wan shouted at his Padawan , switching from his almost mastered soresu style to a more aggressive ataru, swinging his blade down at the young man. Reflecting his blow with a clash of bright light, Anakin jumped back, breathing heavy, sweat glistening on his skin. His Master continued his assault, Anakin , although a quick learner, stumbled back falling on his rear.

“I’m sorry, Master.” Anakin said breathlessly, looking up at the Jedi Knight. Obi-Wan put away his lightsaber, stepping away from him to drink a swig of water. Anakin could feel the disappointment radiating off of the man. “I’ll get better, I promise.” He pleaded to his Master, wishing he wasn’t so harsh on him. 

“You will, Master Qui-Gon and I sensed great potential in you when we first met on Tatooine.” Obi-Wan told him confidently, moving to the fresher next to the training room. When both men were clean, they transferred to a private meditation room. The room doors slid open, revealing a simplistic room, with three circular, raised mats. Qui-Gon had already started his meditation, sitting farthest from the door. When Obi-Wan and Anakin entered, Qui-Gon smiled warmly at the pair, in which they greeted him in return. He had become aware of many things after Naboo. Caring for his past padawan, he wanted to help guide Obi-Wan through his struggles, and help focus young Skywalker’s training. 

“I feel a lesson in letting go of the past is in order for today’s meditation.” Qui-Gon decides, closing his eyes, syncing his Force presence with the other two Jedi in the room. Obi-Wan took a deep breath, forcing himself to relax and open his mind to healing. Lowering his shields, he allowed Anakin and the Jedi Master to enter his mind. Each session started with looking through his mind, to allow his Padawan to gain an understanding of the process before working on his own. Obi-Wan was careful to keep specific memories hazy, focusing on the guilt he felt after Maul gained the upper hand during their battle. The crushing truth of the Sith’s harsh words. 

Anakin furrowed his brow, this was the first time he had seen the infamous Sith in Obi-Wan’s memories. Following Qui-Gon’s lead, he took the anger and fear felt at the image of the dathmorthian hovered overing Obi-Wan’s beaten body and let go, releasing his feelings into the Force. After, he felt at peace with the memory, having witnessed Obi-Wan’s much improved lightsaber skills first hand. Anakin wondered if Obi-Wan became such an expert fighter after suffering the humiliation on Naboo. 

The most experienced one in the trio, Qui-Gon could feel the true weight of Obi-Wan’s guilt.  _ “There is no emotion, there is peace.”  _ He pressed through their bond, and then changed his approach to,  _ “there is no death, there is the Force.”  _

The thoughts that the Jedi Knight kept foggy quickly twisted in pain, brought forth from the corners of his mind. The rooms atmosphere quickly drew darker, opposite from the previously steady rise of light. 

Qui-Gon directed the Force to circle the trio, giving Obi-Wan the strength to face his demons. Anakin didn’t see images, but felt the pain of loss as if it was his own. Ever slowly, the Force presence grew lighter, and Obi-Wan’s feelings were less wild and chaotic. Repeating the code to himself, he was able to sort and release his pain. Having done this for many sessions, Obi-Wan was hesitant that he would ever fully be at peace. Although he relied on the Jedi code to guide him, Qui-Gon openly criticized the council, and that same disent was growing within Obi-Wan as well. Feeling hypocritical, the Jedi Knight understood that he was balancing on a fine line, and that if he did not decide his path, it would be decided for him. The dark side had already placed itself in his soul, digging it’s claws further into Obi-Wan at each stumble. 

Once the room became neutral again, Obi-Wan opened his eyes, looking over at his Padawan. Anakin had a difficult time controlling his emotions, Obi-Wan knew this well, but still was affected by the young man’s pained expression. 

Anakin often fidgeted turning meditation, unused to the Jedi lifestyle. A constant tinkerer during his life as a slave on Tatooine, sitting still was not his forte. Obi-Wan had made it a priority for Anakin to focus on his fear of disappointment. Growing up with the purpose of pleasing others, the Padawan was struggling transition from the desires of his old life to the ones of a Jedi. 

Entering Anakin’s mind, the two older Jedi helped alleviate the elements of the Padawan’s old life that was holding up his Jedi training. 

_ We all must have our secrets.  _ Obi-Wan thought, hoping Anakin does not try to hold himself to such high standards that he did as a Padawan.  _ Maybe I was not strict enough... _ Obi-Wan continued to ponder. Believing he held the code very highly as a youth, his attachment with Senator Amidala strongly rebukes that claim. Letting out a deep breath, he continued the session. 

\----

“Thank you for inviting me here, Uncle. I really needed a breath of fresh air.” Padme smiled at Onaconda , as they crossed a pedestrian bridge, hands in the pockets of her dress. 

“I would never not want to see you,” the rodian confessed, “has your healing improved since we last spoke?” Although cars zoomed under the bridge, there was a discrete sound barrier that created a quiet atmosphere. 

“Physically, I feel fine. Although , I believe it’s quite natural to be in this sort of... mental slump so to speak.” Stopping to look at the city, Onaconda placed a comforting hand on Padme’s back. 

“Your Jedi must share your feelings, when I was in that speeder accident my wife helped me through the recovery. Although I had a run in with the maker, it brought us closer as a couple.” His galaxy eyes smiled, but noticed Padme did not reflect the same sentiment. 

“Obi and I… are in this perpetual cycle of sadness. Both of us are hurting, and our auras just  _ combine _ when we are together. I love him with all my heart but I can’t keep going like this. I need something fresh, undamaged.” Shocked at her own words, she back tracked. “I can’t erase the past, but I would like it to fade.” Biting her lip, she raises her voice slightly. “Oh Uncle I feel so terrible saying these things! How could I want to forget about our baby? About us?” Leaning her back on the railing, Padme felt anxious, unsure how to move forward. Onaconda, not wanting to see her in distress, decided to give the young Senator some advice. 

“It’s clear to me that you don’t want to forget my dear, but rather wish to move forward.” Padme started to protest, but Onaconda continued. “These two are not the same. You will never forget the pain of the past, the same way you won’t forget all the happiness.” 

The fellow Senator smiled at her mentor, letting his words sink in as he continued to speak. “Now it seems you and Obi-Wan are frozen, unable to move forward when the world constantly does around you.” His tone dropped, telling Padme sincerely as he handed her an envelope, wrapping his turquoise hands around hers. “Here’s two passes to Carosi XII, enjoy yourselves. I’ve heard the springs have many natural healing qualities, as well as the relaxation you deserve.” 

Overcome with joy, Padme launched herself into his arms, “Oh Uncle, I knew you would always be there for me. Thank you so much, I believe this is what Obi and I really need.” 

“Now there’s the smile I’ve missed,” Onaconda joked, then suddenly Padme’s comm lit up. She stepped away from slightly to answer the call. 

“Senator Amidala… you must come at once. The Jedi have expertly foiled a plot against your life. The council and I await you in my office.” The calm voice of the Chancellor rang through the device. 

“Oh dear,” Padme smiled jokingly at the rodian, “I guess I am due for a vacation.” 

  
  


\----

“The council has decided that these attempts and threats have gone too far, we strongly advise that you do not travel unprotected any longer.” Mace Windu told Padme, weight to his words. 

“History with the Jedi, you’ve already have had.” The Chancellor stated. “It may be wise to assign Obi-Wan to this mission, having succeeded so greatly under Master Qui-Gon’s leadership while protecting the Senator on Naboo and Tatooine.” He smiled at them all, non threatening. 

“A good first mission for Skywalker, I believe.” Shaak Ti added, agreeing with Palpatine. Padme kept her emotions neutral, although excited how the situation had turned out. If Obi-Wan is assigned to protect her, they could travel to Carosi XII unquestioned. 

Before anyone could object, Padme spoke. “It’s decided then, I will allow the protection from the Jedi until these threats are diminished. Now, I shall retire to my own chambers. I am most grateful for the support. When we stand together, we protect the democracy we have worked so hard to protect.” Struggling to keep the grin off of her face, she returned to her apartment. For the first time since Naboo, Padme fell asleep smiling, excited for tomorrow. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jedi Master Obi-Wan Kenobi and his Padawan, Anakin Skywalker, are assigned to protect Senator Amidala from recent assassination attempts.

“You seem a little on edge.” Obi-Wan tells Anakin, as the glass elevator takes them up the many stories to the Senator’s apartment. The city skyline behind them whisks by, the Padawan’s nervous energy was not credited to the height. 

“Not at all.” Anakin said affirmatively, a little shake in his voice of uncertainty that would be smoothed out with practice. 

“This is your first mission outside of the temple, but relax, it is quite a simple one.” The older man reassured his Padawan. “Plus, you already have met the Senator when Master Qui-Gon and I were on Tatooine. Knowing she is not insufferable company should put you at ease.” Obi-Wan joked, referring to the many times Anakin would complain about a pesky habit a Jedi Master would have. 

“I haven’t seen her in seven years Master.” 

The elevator reached the correct floor, and the two Jedi were greeted by Obi-Wan’s old acquaintance, Jar Jar Binks. No longer dressed in traditional gungan attire, Jar Jar fit right in with the Senate crowd. Obi-Wan had purposefully avoided him while he visited Padme. He appreciated the gungan’s help on Naboo, although he was well known to not be able to keep a secret well. 

“Obi? Obi!” Jar Jar said excitedly shaking the Jedi’s hand. “Misa so excited to seeing yousa!” Anakin stayed a few paces behind Obi-Wan, his anxiety thrown off by the unexpected commotion. 

Padme and her handmaiden rounded the corner , comforted by the reunion after all the threats made against her. 

“Master Kenobi, how nice to see you once again.” 

“And you Senator.” Obi-Wan responded courteously. 

She smiled at him, letting her eyes linger for a moment before noticing the younger man beside him. “Ani? Is that really you?” Padme was surprised at how different Anakin looked from when she last saw him so long ago. “My, you look so grown up.”

“Yes, it is I.” Anakin blushed, “you have changed as well.” 

“Hopefully for the better.” Padme joked, knowing right away that they would all get along wonderfully. Obi-Wan she knew was a good older brother for Anakin. Looking back at Obi-Wan, she still felt the sadness radiating off of him. 

“If I was so forward I would say you have become very beautiful.” Anakin said, which shook Padme from the downward spiral. Not prepared for such a comment she didn’t know what to do so she thanked him quickly. 

“It’s late, I’m very thankful for both of you protecting me, but I feel I will be plenty safe in my room.” With that, Padme and her handmaiden moved to her bedroom, gracious for her friend to still accompion her. Obi-Wan’s regret and sadness was overwhelming, and the Senator no longer wanted to welcome it. The forwardness of Anakin threw her off guard, and right now she wished to relax. 

“Nalia, my world is dark, I wish to see the sun again.” Padme spoke metaphorically to her friend as she released her hair from the intricate braiding. “Obi-Wan used to be my light, but now he too is surrounded in darkness.” Nalia stopped working for a moment and sat by Padme, taking her hand in hers. 

“I have known two others who have lost a child.” She spoke softly with an accent, brown eyes looking at Padme not with the pity she sees so often, but with a purpose. “One, my mother. She was able to find the sun again when I came into her life. The other, my friend from long ago. Separating from the father and finding a new light , one untainted by the same sadness was her path. Whichever journey you take, Senator, is the right destiny for you.”

Watching the cars speed past her window, Padme thanked Nalia for the advice, but she was unsure of what choice she would make. Uncertain of her own feelings, she was ready to become whole again. 

\--------

“‘ I would say you have become very beautiful’? Anakin what’s gotten into you?” Obi-Wan questioned his padawan.

“I’m just speaking how I feel Master.” Anakin furrowed his brows, not understanding why Obi-Wan was questioning his behavior. “Would you say my statement is wrong?” 

Obi-Wan looked flustered. “I- no but, its beside the point. We are here to protect the Senator from potential assasination attempts, not flatter her!” 

Anakin sighed, before his senses picked up something unusual in the Force. 

“What is it?” Obi-Wan felt it too, eyes darting to the elevator, the only way into the apartment.   
“Padme-” Anakin said rushing to the Senator’s bedroom, throwing open the doors with the Force and jumping on her bed, straddling her as he ignited his lightsaber quickly, slicing the alien species meant to kill her. 

The Senator screamed in shock, awaked to Anakin hovering over her to him then suddenly crashing out of the window, launching himself into traffic. Obi-Wan, who was not far behind Anakin, followed suit. Padme was left shaken in the bedroom, screaming in terror when she noticed the dead bug like creature next to her. Dressed in her nightgown, Padme ran to the living space, shutting the bedroom door behind her. Alone, she wrapped her arms around herself. Reminding herself that both Jedi were after her attacker, and the assassination weapon dead in her bedroom, she moved to the guest bedroom, where Obi-Wan and Anakin were supposed to sleep. Slipping under the covers, Padme willed herself to go to sleep. 

\----

The next morning she woke as if everything was normal. Her handmaiden was there, to help her dress as usual, and when she emerged into the living space, the Jedi were having tea. 

“Good morning, Senator. I’m sorry we caused you distress last night.” Obi-Wan started, but Padme waved her hand at him. 

“It’s quite alright, that’s why you’re here is it not?” Padme smiled, moving to make herself some tea as well. When she passed the Jedi Master, she shielded herself from his constant waves of I’m sorry I’m sorry It’s all my fault I’m sorry. 

She still loved him, and wished the sun would shine on him once again. Vowing to talk to him soon, Padme revealed the trip she was planning to take today. 

“Wow, what a mission we got assigned to! Carosi XII, force, I’ve always wanted to go there.” Anakin beamed, delighted at the Senator’s plan. 

“Is that really the safest move right now?” Obi-Wan questioned, which made Padme feel frustrated. 

“Obi-Wan I am not even safe in my own apartment. In my own home.” She referred to Naboo. “We will go to Carosi XII. I already have tickets for Nalia and I, you both will be covered by the Senate.” Padme concluded. 

“Fine, but we will not be participating in whatever Carosi XII has to offer.” Obi-Wan crossed his arms unhappily. 

“Come on Master, we can have a little fun.” Anakin smiled at Padme. Obi-Wan opened his mouth as if to say something but then swiftly closed it, frowning at the two of them. Anakin , oblivious to the tension, kept pushing. “Well I guess if you feel so strongly about it, you can stand watch while the Senator, Nalia, and I have fun, I’ll be watching too of course. ” 

Padme rolled her eyes at the juvenile comment, although happy that Anakin was being lighthearted about the whole protection from assassination assignment. She was sure he would still be doing his job, apparent from the rushed way she was awakened last night. Obi-Wan, irritated by his padawan’s comments, moved to prepare the ship for transport.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Padme’s new crew head to Carosi XII.

“We have a few days before we reach our destination.” Obi-Wan announced, hand on the edge of the map, leaning over it. He pointed to their current location and the very far away outer rim planet. 

“A few days? I could get us there in a couple hours.” Anakin poked at Obi-Wan. “Here move over, I’ll just engage the hyperdrive-” 

“Engaging the hyperdrive is exactly what I’m trying to avoid. The Senator doesn’t like to use it unnecessarily.” Obi-Wan gruffed, pushing the younger man away from the controls. 

“And how do you know what the Senator likes, I bet you’re just trying to delay our arrival.” 

“I asked her, of course.” Obi-Wan lied. Sometimes he wondered if lying to his Padawan influences his disobedience. Nalia entered the control room. 

“Would you both like to eat dinner now? Padme and I were about to begin.” 

Both women were dressed more casual than usual, opting for simple , more neutral colors compared to the extravagant wear on Coruscant. 

“Of course.” Obi-Wan decided, Anakin following his lead. The Jedi followed Nalia to the main area of the ship, were Padme was already sitting in the rounded booth. 

“I’m glad you both will be joining us for dinner, this trip will definitely be more fun with twice the company.” Although the trip was planned just for her and Obi-Wan, she did enjoy these new arrangements. “I hope you like snow.” She teased, having mountain climbing as the first activity on Carosi XII. 

“I’ve actually have never seen snow before.” Anakin revealed. 

“Really? Well I’m glad I’m able to show you.” Padme felt warm, Anakin still had a refreshing innocence about him. “Don’t underestimate the cold.” She pointed her fork at him. “I would dress extra warm Anakin, the cold isn’t friendly to newcomers.”

“Thank you for the advise, Senator.” 

“Call me Padme, the both of you. Even though you’re here for my protection, I would like to regard you both as friends.” She smiled warmly at the two of them. 

“Well seeing we’re friends now…” Anakin raised his hand subtly, and the apple flew from Padme’s plate to his palm. 

“Anakin! That’s completely disrespectful.” Obi-Wan snapped, shocked by his Padawan’s actions. 

“Sorry Master.” Anakin said sarcastically, taking a bite out of the apple. 

“Oh Obi-Wan it’s only good fun. It’s a good show.” 

“Yes but the force isn’t for entertainment.” Obi-Wan pulled the apple from Anakin’s hands with the force, splitting it in half, and delivering the untouched side back to Padme’s plate. 

“Anakin, how is your training going? So much must have happened since I last saw you. You were so little.” Padme thought fondly of the little sandy haired boy she once met on Tatooine. 

“I’m much stronger now.” Anakin answered, smile faltering. “I’m very grateful that Obi-Wan decided to take me as his Padawan.” 

“Yes, Obi-Wan is a good man.” She responded, glancing over at the other Jedi, gauging his reaction. Obi-Wan chose not to respond, knowing he once was the one who fought against Anakin’s training. 

Disappointed by his reaction, she asked Nalia if she felt like helping her arrange the snow equipment, to pass the time. 

“I would love to, but suddenly I’m not feeling too well.” The handmaiden said, pinching the bridge of her nose. 

“Were you not feeling well before the trip?” Padme asked concerned. 

“Just a sore throat, nothing serious, but it escalated so much the past couple hours. I’m sorry Padme.” 

“No it’s alright, excuse us-” Padme stood, helping Nalia up. “I’ll see you both in a little while, I’m going to help her to bed.” 

Concerned, Obi-Wan hoped the girl was alright. From her symptoms it most likely was either an aggressive cold or a fever. When the two women left, Anakin turned to his Master. 

“The Senator is so caring, just like how I remember her from when I first saw her on Tatooine. I know the handmaiden is not a slave… but I’ve never seen someone treat the person below them as such an equal.”

“She cares more for others than she does for herself. It has made her a quite successful and charismatic politician.” Obi-Wan responded. 

“That’s a very Jedi trait, being selfless.” 

“I suppose it is.” 

“She’s very beautiful too.” 

“That comment is very out of line, and you know it.” Obi-Wan said firmly. “Secondly, this is out of character of you. I know we haven’t discussed emotional attachment in romantic terms very much, but you are aware of the Jedi’s view on such relationships.” 

“Yes but I felt this way about her before I became a Jedi. I’ve thought about her almost every day since I met her. You can’t tell me I should deny my feelings now, if I’ve felt this way for so long it must be right.” 

“Padme sees you as a child, Anakin your desire is foolish.” Obi-Wan stood, clearing the table. He wasn’t aware of these feelings his Padawan was having. 

“Not everything the council tells you is right.” Anakin states heatedly before storming off. Although they were on a ship, they all still had their own chambers. 

Obi-Wan knew that this way of speaking felt stifling, and for him, disingenuous. 

\---

It was an hour till their arrival to the outer rim.

“Well I think it’s a suitable time to get dressed for the weather.” Padme announced, smoothing her tunic as she stood up. “Obi-Wan could you set the temperature a bit lower? We don’t want to get to hot all wrapped up.” 

Nalia was still in bed, a minor fever overtaking her. “Unfortunately Nalia will not be joining us, she has proposed she watch the ship while she recovers.” Padme said regretfully. 

Obi-Wan messed with the thermostat while Anakin started unpacking the winter gear. 

“I think I need some pointers…” Anakin confessed, looking at his laid out winter clothes. “What order ?” He looked back at Padme for guidance. 

“A good rule of thumb is going from small to large.” She suggested. Picking up some items, she rearranged them in the order Anakin should put them on for best comfort and warmth. The padawan quickly memorized the pattern for the future. Obi-Wan now back, started dressing himself. 

They all wore black outer layers, since it absorbs heat more than other colors. 

“Wait what if I have to use the bathroom?” Anakin asked jokingly. 

“You take everything off for a moment.” Padme responded, watching his smile fade from his face. 

“Oh, uh I’ll be right back.” Anakin, half dressed in winter gear, went to the restroom, leaving the Senator and the other jedi alone. 

Already in his overcoat and Padme in just the overalls, she leaned against Obi-Wan, squeezing his upper arm. “Haven’t you gotten a little soft.” She teased. 

“Aren’t you one to talk.” He teased back, poking her overall covered hip. Slipping her hands in his open coat, she felt the warm fabric affectionately. 

“Will you keep me warm when we camp? You and Anakin have separate tents, he’d never know if you left yours.” Looking down at Padme, Obi-Wan felt tempted by her offer. 

“Padme-” Obi-Wan started to respond, but Padme cut him off.  
“Shh. Surprise me.” She whispered, kissing his cheek before zipping up his jacket. 

Finishing putting on her own outfit, Anakin returned. Obi-Wan looked away from him for a moment to compose himself, letting the kiss sink in. They all finished getting ready, and Padme spent time with Nalia for a while to make sure she knew if she contacted her anytime, they would come and take her to a medical center. Along with having beautiful mountains and hot springs, the planet was also known for advancement in medicine and care. 

Entering the atmosphere, they landed among other tourists. Taking a local speeder to the beginning of the hiking trail, the three watched as soaring glaciers and mountains breezed by. Traveling with some other passengers, mostly couples, there were not many other people enjoying the same route as them. The entire planet was different variants of this landscape, which gave the visitors privacy and serenity. 

Packed tightly in the speeder, Anakin became increasingly more aware of how close he was to the Senator. Although separated by many layers of clothing, he liked the way their shoulders touched. 

Similarly, Padme leaned on Obi-Wan subtly, unnoticeable to the others. 

Obi-Wan, unlike the rest of his companions, was watching the other passengers, gauging if they seemed normal, or if they had an ulterior motive for being here. But as all of them were couples, and the driver being native to the planet, Obi-Wan felt that it was unlikely. 

Anakin felt a little overwhelmed by the sights, pointing out landscape features he felt was interesting to Padme every couple seconds. She could tell the young man was cold, but respected that he didn’t complain about it. Maybe he was too distracted by the planet to have noticed. 

Finally they reached their stop, Anakin quickly jumping out and offering a hand to Padme to help her down. Obi-Wan exited the speeder after her, but the rest of the passengers stayed on. The vehicle left as soon as it came, going to the next trail head Obi-Wan presumed. Being the only group dropped off at this location, Obi-Wan finally allowed himself to admire the world around him.


	9. Chapter 9

“This reminds me of Naboo.” Padme tells Obi-Wan and they start to set up camp. The team is perched on the mountain top, overlooking a valley with a frozen river. Anakin was standing a little too close to the edge for Padme’s comfort, but she trusted he could handle himself. 

“Oh definitely.” Obi-Wan responded sarcastically throwing a snowball at her. Meaning to hit her in the back of the head, the Senator turned around and was hit square in the face. Obi-Wan covered his mouth to hide his laugh at her stunned face. 

Padme quickly moved to retaliate, scooping up snow and chucking it in Obi-Wan’s direction. 

“Hey!” Obi-Wan shouted playfully dodging the snow. “I thought you were a better shot than that.” He looked at the sad smushed snowball on the ground next to him. 

Padme made another, “I’m good at hand to hand combat too.” She laughed, lunging at him. Obi-Wan hopped back, just out of her reach. 

The commotion and laughter behind Anakin brought his attention away from the landscape. “What are you guys doing?” He asked the pair. 

Obi-Wan stopped running to answer his padawan, which Padme took full advantage of. At close range, a handful of snow to the face did much more damage than just a lucky shot. Obi-Wan gasped pushing her away, shaking his hair and trying to quickly remove the snow. 

“It’s freezing!” Obi-Wan shivers, breathing into his hands. 

“We’re having a snowball fight! It’s a fun game.” Padme explained. 

“Oh I see. Hey Padme are you alright? It looks as if you’re bleeding.” Anakin asked in a concerned tone. 

“What really? I-” Padme went to touch her face, thinking maybe some ice made it’s way into Obi-Wan’s last shot, when a snowball nailed her in the chest making Anakin laugh out loud. 

“You’re so easy to fool! I’ve been playing sand attack since I was a baby!” Anakin shouted, running away. The area they were at was slanted slightly, making it easy for the young man to run up to higher ground. 

“Very strategic location!” Obi-Wan praised him. Using the force, he pushed the snow in a way to form a small barrier for him to hide behind while on the defense. Everyone was laughing, and Padme joined Obi-Wan behind the snow. 

They both quickly made their ammunition, and then on three threw as many as they could at the exposed Padawan. Hitting him square in both the face and in the chest, Anakin’s smile froze, and he stumbled before falling into the snow, rolling down the hill. 

Obi-Wan knew it was another act, but Padme ran down to see if he was alright. Anakin laid face down in the snow, she put a hand on his shoulder to turn him around. 

“Ani are you alright?” She asked concerned, but Obi-Wan was right. The young man turned around quickly making her jump, and he pounced on her, tumbling down the hill a little more. Padme laughed as she held onto Anakin. 

“No, don’t!” She screamed, giggling, holding up her hands as Anakin hovered above her, a very large amount of snow in his right hand. Now straddling her, he dramatically rubbed the snow all over her face, stuffing a little bit into her collar. Screaming about how cold it is, she threw snow back at him, which he easily dodged. 

Instead of retaliating, Anakin looked at the woman underneath him. Her face flushed from the game, he looked down from her dark eyes to her mouth, watching the steady puffs of her breath meeting the cold air. He began to think of her without the winter gear, enjoying the way she called him Ani before, like when he was a kid. 

Yanked roughly off of her, Anakin stumbled back. He didn’t even remember hearing Obi-Wan’s footsteps, too focused on the senator. 

The older Jedi helped Padme up, and dusted some of the snow from the top of her hat, before it got in her eyes. He knew what was going on in Anakin’s mind, and chose to ignore it at the moment. 

“It’ll get dark soon, lets get some dinner and then call it a night.” He decided. Anakin looked from his master to Padme, the longing in his eyes still clear. 

“I’m going to check to see if Nalia is doing fine.” Padme told the two, gesturing to her comlink before making it back up the hill to talk in her tent, to cut down on the wind. Anakin started to follow her but Obi-Wan caught his arm, holding him back. 

“How many times do I have to ask you to restrain yourself, Anakin.” Obi-Wan asked seriously, arms crossed. 

“Restrain myself? Like how you do?” Anakin shot back. “I know more than you think, I am no child, master.” 

“What on Earth are you talking about.” Obi-Wan played dumb, wanting to hear what his Padawan had to say. His relationship with the younger man had been tense from the very beginning. Lately, Anakin has been expressing his feelings more and more openly.

“I know you didn’t want me as your Padawan.” Anakin furrowed his brow, clenching his fist. “The council had to beg you to take me, I’m grateful, I really am. But I was not raised in the temple.” Obi-Wan let him continue, “I see the way you look at her. You may be able to restrain yourself, but that’s something I can’t do.” Anakin’s eyes pierced into Obi-Wan, almost in a challenging way. 

Treading carefully, Obi-Wan carefully worded his response. 

“You’re right. I didn’t want you.” Obi-Wan saw the hurt in his padawan’s eyes instantly. “But you are here now, the council assigned me to train you, and train you I will. Anakin, we are now brothers.” Obi-Wan laid a hand on the other man’s shoulder, speaking more softly. “If this is not the path you wish to follow, I will let go.” Speaking honestly, Obi-Wan remembered when he contemplated leaving the order. 

“You are my brother, but you will never love me as one.” 

Hurt by Anakin’s words, Obi-Wan watched solemnly as the younger man turned his back to him, walking towards camp. 

\---

Hands slipped under the waistband of his snow pants, Anakin palmed himself as he lay curled on his side under the privacy of his tent, warmth flooding up his neck. Staring at nothing, lips parted, he stayed as quiet as possible, the only sound in the small shelter was the rustling of clothes and his choked breath. 

The wind outside perfectly masked the Jedi’s desire, it had started to snow quickly after dark. Anakin recalled the images in his mind like he’s done a million times when he was a child still on Tatooine. The soft curve of her face, the way her chestnut eyes would look up at him. He imagined her biting her lip, asking if this was alright as she touched his thigh. 

“Yes-, yes please.” Anakin begged, speeding up his movements. Releasing with a silent moan, he squeezed his eyes shut, breathing heavy. Coming down off his high, the young man rolled onto his back, the aftershocks of pleasure still pulsing through him.

Hearing the faint unzipping of a tent, Anakin froze, grabbing his lightsaber as he focused on the noise outside.  _ ‘Maybe someone just needed to relieve themselves.’  _ Anakin thought hopefully, relaxing. Though when he heard the second tent, he became curious again. Opening his own tent slightly, the moon did little to illuminate the mountain top. 

Still, he was able to make out Padme’s figure, going into his master’s tent. Anakin felt jealous that Padme sought Obi-Wan’s company over his. He wondered if something had unsettled the Senator, or perhaps she was updating Obi-Wan on her handmaiden’s status. 

Whichever it was, Anakin knew he wanted Padme to look at him the same way she looked at Obi-Wan. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi all, 
> 
> I would really love your feedback about the direction this fic is taking. I am on winter break now, therefore there has been lots of updates, but once I am back at university it will be difficult for me to find motivation to keep writing. 
> 
> Your comments and kudos mean the world to me!


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Padme, Obi-Wan, & Anakin enjoy the springs of Carosi XII.

The lush green of the valley stood in contrast to the white mountains. The grass felt soft between Padme’s toes as she walked on the edge of the spring. After a couple days of climbing the mountains, although beautiful, she was ready to sink into the warm water. 

It was quite cold outside of the water, so she wore a knit robe from the lodge they were staying at. The planet radiated energy, she could feel the warmth travel up her body from where her feet were connected to Carosi XII. 

She tried to insist Obi-Wan and Anakin enjoy the healing springs, but the older Jedi became stubborn as always. Padme remembered her conversation with Nalia, and intended to have the same conversation with her husband soon. The sereneness of the planet had given her the time and strength to determine what she wanted for the future, and she hoped she could convince Obi-Wan to go down that path together. 

Anakin nelt by the water, scooping up some in his hands. “Wow, Padme you’re going to love this, it’s nice and warm.” He smiled at her, before lying on his side next to the spring. “...I wish I could get in.” He said quietly, looking at his Master, hoping he would allow it. 

Obi-Wan ignored him, taking note of the other’s around them, escape routes, blind spots. 

Padme sensed how on edge he was, but couldn’t think of a way to have the conversation. Anakin was here, she wanted everyone to enjoy themselves but Obi-Wan constantly being on edge made it difficult. 

“Look, those caves over there.” She pointed to the way the mountain curved in on itself, small walkways leading to a much larger inside. “A woman at the lodge told me there are springs inside, as well as it being very secure.” She emphasised. “If you think it’s necessary,” Padme looked at Obi-Wan, “One of you can stand guard while the other enjoys the spring.” 

Obi-Wan knew what Padme was trying to do, and appreciated that she was trying to meet him halfway. A cave would definitely be easier to defend, but he didn’t like the idea of cutting their defense in half. 

_ ‘Please?’  _ Padme sent to Obi-Wan. He looked at her, conflicted. 

“I think that’s a great idea.” Anakin beamed, thinking of how great it’ll be to swim in the heated water, and to spend some time with Padme, away from his overbearing Master. 

“Lead the way.” Obi-Wan agreed, watching how excited Anakin had become. “Relax, Padawan.” He told him pointedly, his look more stern than his words. 

As they arrived, Anakin asked Padme if he could go in the water first, and she agreed. The young man ran inside, ready for the spring to sooth his aching muscles. Padme stood outside for a few minutes, while the Padawan got settled. Obi-Wan stood alert in the entrance of the cave. 

“When it’s your turn I want you to forget about any of these potential assassins.” Padme said gently, “I want to meditate with you.” 

They hadn’t mediated together for a while, and it sounded very appealing. Obi-Wan nodded, and Padme touched his arm reassuringly before going inside. The sound of running water was calming, running down the back of the cave into the pool in the middle. Moss covered the entire ground, light dimly flooding from the opening to the outside. 

Anakin laid neck deep in the healing pool, head back against the wall behind him. He opened his eyes when Padme entered, sitting up a bit to look at her. 

“You really need to get in here Padme, it feeling kirfing amazing.” Anakin groaned, slipping under the water for a second. 

The Senator loved how honest Anakin was, even if improper. His personality was nice and refreshing, not something she saw often from past slaves. 

Padme turned away from Anakin and removed her coat, revealing a plain white bathing suit underneath. The Padawan poked his head above the water slightly, watching her silently, enjoying the way the fabric clung to her curves. 

“Alright, watch out I’m coming in!” Padme said happily, jumping into the pool. She came up laughing, swimming to the side. “You’re right, it does feel amazing.” 

“Especially after that hike.” Anakin responded, splashing water in her direction. Padme screamed holding up her arms as the water rained down on her. She splashed him back by kicking out her feet, but Anakin swam forward grabbing them. 

“What are you doing?” Padme giggled, twisting her legs. “Let me go.” 

Anakin shushed her with a grin on his face, wrestling to keep her legs still. “Do you want Obi-Wan running in here?” He teased, rubbing the bottom of her foot. 

“Maybe I do.” Padme said back, finally getting her feet free, swimming away from Anakin. 

“Obi-Wan would ruin the fun,” Anakin whined, rolling his eyes. “He’s always critiquing me, wanting me to be some... robot that just fights and uses the force. I can’t be like him, I have feelings.” He confessed. 

Padme swam closer to him so they were at a more comfortable talking distance. 

“Obi-Wan’s trying to do what he feels is right.” Padme said, slightly defensive. “Not everyone is perfect, even the ‘Chosen One’.” Padme smiled at him. “Sometimes you need to focus and place value on your own expectations and goals, not on someone else's. You must follow your own path in life, and do what you think is right. Think about it, if you keep chasing someone else's dream for you, will you ever truely be happy?” 

“But being a Jedi isn’t about happiness, it’s about serving the Force-” 

Padme cut him off. “This is the only life we have, let's try to live it to the fullest.” She didn’t want to see Anakin feel responsible for things he didn’t have a choice over, and really she needed to say it outloud to convince herself of the same. Lost in thought for a moment, she was pulled back when Anakin took her hand in his. 

“You’re beautiful, Padme.” Anakin spoke honestly, “You’re the most beautiful, smart, kind person I’ve ever met.” He tried pulling her closer but she turned away. 

“You’ll meet many kind people on your missions,” Padme responded carefully, “you’re still so young, Ani.” 

“You don’t understand,” Anakin touched the smooth skin of her back with the back of his hand, “I love you.” 

“Ani, we can’t do this.” Padme responded, slightly uncomfortable. 

“But you just told me to follow my own path!” Anakin said, frustrated. “Do you really think of me that terribly?” 

Padme felt guilty, she didn’t mean for the conversation to go in this direction. She wasn’t even aware Anakin had these feelings. How clouded her vision must have been, of course he’s not a child anymore. 

“I think you’ll become a great person.” Padme said, looking him in the eye. “But I don’t want the same type of relationship that you do.” 

“Why not?” Anakin said persistently, his voice cracking. 

“I love another, I’m married.” Padme revealed, releasing a breath she didn’t know she was holding. She searched his eyes, hoping he could understand and move past this infatuation. 

“You can love more than one person, Padme.” Anakin responded, “marriage is just an excuse.” 

“I don’t need to explain myself to you, please be satisfied with what I’ve already said.” Padme said finally, pausing a few seconds. “I think it’s time for you to switch with Obi-Wan.” 

\---

After that tense conversation with Anakin, Padme didn’t know if she could have such a heavy conversation with Obi-Wan. 

He rolled up his pant legs and took his shoes off, sitting himself on the side of the spring, legs in the water. Padme swam over to him, and mimicked his position. It was a little cold being out of the water, but the cave trapped a lot of heat inside. 

Obi-Wan wanted to speak, but Padme stopped him.  _ “Lets talk later.” _ Taking his hand with hers, she took a deep breath, clearing her mind. It didn’t take long for their minds to become connected, and for Padme to share what Obi-Wan was seeing. In the past, he thought he was seeing snippets of the future, but now he only saw the horrors of the past. 

Padme tried combatting the bad memories with the good. Their first kiss, the wedding, the joy she felt when she found out she was carrying their child. 

Obi-Wan pulled his hand away from hers, bringing it to his face to hide the silent tears which rolled down his face. Padme wrapped an arm around his waist and lay her head on his shoulder, using the strength from the healing pool to help mend Obi-Wan’s mind. 


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Anakin is sent on a mission, while Obi-wan & Padme enjoy the indoor healing pods at the lodge.

At the breakfast table back at the lodge, they enjoyed the warmth of breakfast delights. Anakin took practically one of everything from the bar, his plate overflowing comically. Obi-wan ate his cranberry orange muffin calmly, still sleepy from waking up. He felt relaxed, more at peace than usual. He’s sure their time at the healing pools helped calm his mind. Padme watches the other two sleepily, yawning a bit until she gets a sip of her coffee. After she finishes her oatmeal, she decides to inform them of their change of plans. 

“I’ve been thinking, and there’s going to be a change of plans today.” She announced, getting their attention. “I haven’t heard from Nalia for a day, and she was supposed to check in already.” They looked concerned so she quickly followed with, “she’s most likely alright, but I still would appreciate it if you would travel to check on her, Anakin.” 

He nodded, not looking directly at her, playing with the food on his plate. “Yeah I can do that.” 

“Great, thank you.” Padme could tell he wasn’t that pleased with his mission. “Obi-wan and I are going to spend the day here, so don’t feel like if you don’t rush back you’ll miss something exciting.” Padme jokes, trying to cheer the young man up. Obi-wan likes the idea of having a nice day inside, and watches her fondly from across the table. 

“I’ll leave immediately.” Anakin said, wrapping up his breakfast. They didn’t speak much after that, outloud that is. 

“_ What’s on the agenda today dear?” _Obi-wan sent, intoxicatingly sweet. 

_ “I was thinking… Spend some time in the healing chambers, then warm up by the fireplace?” _She suggested. 

Obi-wan felt his face heat in, then he suddenly choked on his muffin, coughing for a few seconds. His face flushed more in embarrassment, it wasn’t as if Padme said anything lewd. Anakin shot him a glare before upbrumply leaving the table. The two left watched him storm off. 

“He’s been quite… angry lately.” Padme said, not sure how else to put it. 

“I’ve noticed.” He agreed, “our relationship has been a little strained.” 

“He told me a bit about it, Anakin feels that you’re a bit over controlling.” Padme admitted, hoping Obi-wan would understand. 

“Anakin’s so different than any other padawan I’ve known. He’s unruly, doesn’t listen to instructions. Honestly, I don’t believe I should be training him.” Obi-wan reminded Padme of the conversation he had with the council. “He doesn’t respect me, I can’t even imagine myself acting like this with Qui-gon when I was still in training.” 

“Obi, you can’t expect him to be like you, or anyone else in the temple. His background is so different, and I understand he’s difficult, but maybe you need to cut him some slack.” Padme defended. “You know best that not everything is perfect with the order. Maybe he needs to find his own path as well.” She said, reaching out to take his hand. 

“He’s my responsibility, I can’t just allow him to do whatever he likes.” 

Padme sighed, that’s not what she meant. “I need to talk to you about our future, let’s figure out what to do with the little boy from Tatooine later, alright?” She said, ending the conversation.

They cleaned up the table, and headed down to the healing chambers. 

“_ Will you be alright by yourself?” _ Obi-wan asked, as they approached the two pods. The size of escape pods, the lodge imported spring water inside so that guests can have the choice of bathing naturally outside, or inside. These chambers harnessed the healing power of the spring, to create a comfortable healing experience. 

“_ I’ll be right next to you, I’ll say if I need anything.” _Padme reassured him. She thought about doing the couple pod, but felt that today they would most benefit from individual healing. 

Obi-wan watched Padme step into the steam filled pod, the door shutting quietly behind her. He took a deep breath to center himself before entering his own pod, faint light illuminating the space. Just steam at first, he could already feel his stress lessen as he read the brief instructions on the wall. He could choose a number of options, from the level of the water, to the humidity level. Obi-wan chuckled at a couple of the options, since they were definitely not meant for humans. “Full body submersion.” He mumbled, making sure not to press that option. 

While Obi-wan debated over which button to press, Padme was already shoulder deep, enjoying how the warm water moved about soothingly. 

“_ Relax. I can feel how active you are.” _Padme shook her head, as his noisy mind soon calmed down. 

“_ Hard, I’m thinking about the fire tonight.” _ Obi-wan said, relaxing as the chamber warmed up. 

“_ That should be a relaxing thought.” _She said faintly, about to slip into sleep. 

Padme couldn’t hear his response, as she allowed herself to begin the healing process. 

\---  
  


Since Padme’s ship couldn’t hold speeders, Anakin had to entirely rely on public transit to get back to the ship bay. He spent a good hour waiting outside the lodge, since he watched sadly as the transit left right when he arrived. He therefore had time to plan out the route perfectly in his head. It was about a two hours drive, then he’d have to get off and wait for the other bus to take him directly to the right ship port, but thankfully the schedule showed that the second transit would be arriving right when he arrived. 

Patience was never something he was quite good at, shooting out of his seat when the bus approached. Since the terrain would be rocky, it was built like a tank, with a larger top portion that was enclosed and, Anakin hoped, heated. The first to climb aboard, he chose a comfortable seat behind the driver, and hugged himself, since it was indeed as cold inside as it was outside. He was starting to regret not bringing a larger overcoat, since it wasn’t that cold out, but being out there for so long was draining. Anakin envied that Obi-wan was able to stay behind and enjoy the lodge. He knew that Padme probably sent him away since he revealed his feelings for her. It hurt him alot, and hoped that she would warm back up to him. 

She had such a closeness with Obi-wan, so much he swore they could tell what the other was thinking from just a glance. Being more familiar with his master, Anakin has constantly picked up on his lingering looks at the Senator. He knew Obi-wan, the most uptight man he’s ever known, would never make a pass at Padme like he did, but Anakin still didn’t feel secure leaving them alone together. Obi-wan knew how he felt about her, about how he loved her since he first met her, so there’s no way he’d hurt Anakin like that, right? 

His lips curved downward slightly, eyebrows pinched. Although he wished it to be true, he couldn’t help the feeling of doubt that crossed his mind. Looking out the window, he continued to think to himself as the trees flew by around them as the transport made its way further away from the lodge. 

\---

Feeling like jelly, the Jedi and Senator made their way back to their penthouse hotel room, arm in arm. Since Padme opted to infuse salts into the water, she wanted to rinse off when they got back. Although along the way, she couldn’t resist stopping by the food court to grab a bite to eat. It was later in the day now, and she thought about how Anakin should be reaching the ship now, and wished Nalia well. 

Their room in the lodge was set up with a master bed & bath, a cosy common room in the middle where the fireplace was set, and a guest bedroom and kitchen to the right. The floors were the same dark wood as the rafters, with warm furs spread about instead of carpet. Obi-wan got to business, wanting to surprise Padme. He arranged the furs and took pillows from the couch so they could lounge comfortably on the floor next to the fire. The fire itself was protected behind glass, but slits allowed warm air to flood the cool space. Obi-wan preferred a more natural, earthy fire, but the flickers of blue were pleasant to look at. Finally, he changed into a light cream colored tunic and shorts that he wore for bed, and collected candles to light romantically. 

By the time the Jedi did all this, Padme stepped out of the shower, and released her still dry hair from the shower cap. Her hair was more full than normal, from all the exposure from steam, but still flowed elegantly hugging her face, neck, and shoulders attractively. Wrapping herself in a bathrobe, she stepped out of her bedroom into the common space, her relaxed face transforming into a pleasant smile as she saw what Obi-wan had transformed the space into. 

He sat in the collection of furs, legs splayed, crossed at the ankles. He sat up a bit when he saw her, reaching out his hand for hers. 

“Won’t you join me?”


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angst & Relaxation

“Won’t you join me?” 

Padme looked away for a moment, a blush rising in her face. “Obi, what is all this?” She asked, walking forward, taking his outreached hand in hers. Bringing it to his lips, making her laugh at the sheer romanticism of the moment. Obi-wan pulled her down gently making them both giggle at the senator losing her balance, falling right on him. 

“Ah- I’m sorry.” Padme laughed, rubbing where her knee unceremoniously jabbed into Obi-wan’s side. 

“It’s alright, I’m not made of glass.” He said kissing her cheek, arms wrapping around her once more. 

\---

Anakin wasn’t sure when he slipped into sleep, but was surprised he was able to because the cold of the transport along with the occasional jolt from the rocky road wasn’t the most peaceful situation. He awoke with the sound of the wheels screeching to a halt, and passengers funneling past him in the isle. Anakin took off his comlink , holding it between his hands to warm it up, since it sometimes stutters when cold. 

The last person still on the ship, he left his seat. Walking down the thin isle, he ran straight into a boarding passenger. Still looking down at his comlink, Anakin was caught off guard, the device slipping out of his fingers as he tried to use the structure around him to regain balance. Holding the arm of the person in front of him, party to keep them from falling as well, he looked down, wonder who could be so  _ rude _ as to come onto the transport before everyone left-

“Anakin?” The frozen girl asked, slightly shocked to see the familiar man infront of her. He let go of Nalia, and stepped back to create some distance between them. “What are you doing here?” 

“I was coming to check on you.” Anakin responded matter of fact, unsure what Nalia was doing away from the ship. 

“Hey! Chit-chat in a seat or outside, I got to keep a tight schedule!” The driver said grumply, so the pair returned to Anakin’s recently abandoned seat, not wanting to become any colder. Anakin didn’t really know how to handle cold all that well, but he preferred it to the endless hot days on Tatooine, and the bad memories that followed. 

“Ah, my comlink.” Anakin left for a second, shifting past the oncoming passengers to find the poor device forgotten in the slush by the door. He picked it up, wiping on his jacket, but it was unresponsive. Returning with a loud sigh, the Jedi fussed over the broken wristlet. 

“I’m sorry about your comlink, it’s actually the reason I’m here too.” Nalia told him, hands tucked under her thighs. Anakin wasn’t looking directly at her, so she explained more. “Mine ran out of juice, and I forgot a charge pack. They last so long, seven days usually, so at Coruscant we usually just swap them out with a precharged one when the time comes.” She bit her lip, worried. “I hope Padme doesn’t think too much about it. She did send you, I’m just worried I’ve worried her…” She said, more talking to herself than the man next to her. 

“She was a little... worried, but I’m sure the Senator just wanted to send me away.”

“I’m sorry.” 

“For what?” Anakin responded, too much bite in his voice. Nalia’s apology sounded genuine, but that only made him feel worse. 

“I’m sorry you’re in pain.” 

\----

Lights dancing across exposed skin, back pressed into the soft white of the carpet, Padme felt more at peace than she did in ages. Intimate moments like these, just her and Obi-wan, nobody else in the world.

\---

Anakin never expected to get back to the lodge so quickly, but Nalia joining him early cut their trip in half. Returning in just over four hours, it wasn’t completely dark yet. Still, the lodge radiated warmth, and both were eager to get inside. Nalia snuggled up against Anakin eventually during the trip, but neither mentioned it. 

Striding past the check in, after flashing his pass to the attendant, Anakin waited impatiently at the elevators. 

“Why are you trying to get back so fast? I know Padme sent you on a mission but it’s alright for us to take our time.” She said, taking her hat off as she was quickly warming up, knocking the remaining slush from the bottom of her boots. 

“Something just… doesn’t feel right.” Anakin mused. “And I like to get jobs done as fast as possible anyways, that’s how you get free time to yourself.” 

“Free time to do what?” 

“To do… things.” 

“Things?” She pressed. 

“Things.” Anakin gave her a sharp look, lips pursed as if annoyed. Leaning against the wall, she took a deep breath and watched the elevator. 

“Moments like these are what I enjoy most.” Nalia said finally, content. 

“Wet socks and broken comlinks?” Anakin jokes, lightening up a little. Nalia only smiled back, relaxed. 

“Warm air,” she took a deep breath, “soft lights,” she closed her eyes, “music.” 

Anakin hadn’t noticed the soft playing of classical music over the speakers, but if he focused, it was indeed relaxing. Nalia still had her eyes closed, as if in a dream. 

“Hot chocolate, silk sheets…” She trailed off, as the familiar ting of the elevator sounded. 

Stepping into the elevator, Nalia could feel the anxiety radiating off of Anakin. “Relax, I’ll go first.” She reassures him with a smile. She could be insecure herself at times, but quickly is able to put on a brave face when she knows others are struggling. The lights dim, she wasn’t sure if anyone was still awake. Walking through the fourier, the servant opened the door to the main space, revealing the glow of coals and a cuddling couple on the sofa. Dressed in pajamas, Nalia wondered if they wanted to sleep together on the couch, or the bed just seemed too far. 

She felt happy for the Senator, since she knew the two of them were having a difficult time communicating. Although, this serene moment was cut short by Anakin running into where she abruptly stopped, and she quickly told him to be quiet before he woke the pair. 

“Why do I have to-” Anakin whispered, although still too loud for Nalia’s liking. She pushed at him, gesturing for them to go into the guest bedroom. Unmoving, she became frustrated, and shoved harder, snapping him out of his spell. 

“Give them some privacy for kriff’s sake.” 

She expected the sight would make him harden and become more enraged, but instead it seemed to break the young Jedi’s spirit. His head down, he followed her lead into the separate room. Removing his hat and coat, he slumped down on the edge of the bed, legs dangling, eyes on the ceiling. Nalia rolled her eyes at the dramatics, especially his long winded sigh at the end. Sitting next to him, she decided for everyone’s sake on the trip, she would give him a quick talking to. 

“Anakin, sit up.” 

He ignored her, rolling to the side. 

“You need to stop acting like a child, you need to be your own parent now.” Nalia took hold of his shoulders, helping him sit up so they could speak eye to eye. “Obi-wan is not your father, you need to stop treating him like he is.” She told him straight. “You can’t expect people to be what you want them to be, and if you’re unsure of your relationship with someone, it’s not wrong to ask.” She tried to soften her voice a bit, since the man reflected the years of emotional trauma in his soft eyes. “Obi-wan is your master, he is training you to become a Jedi. You have made your feelings known to Senator Amidala, and she’s told you she doesn’t feel the same.” A heavy silence filled the air, Anakin’s eyes darting about, trying to hold back tears. 

“I don’t want to be a child.” He finally said, “I’m just so confused right now, Obi-wan’s has always told me attachment is forbidden, so w-why is he holding her that way? Doesn’t he know how I feel?” He choked, wiping the newly fallen tears from his face. He doesn’t know how Nalia has gotten him to open up so quickly, but he knows this is what he needs to hear. She gathers him into a hug, rubbing his back softly, the way his mother used to do. “...why would he do this to me?” 

“I can’t make excuses, but I can tell you how you’re reacting now was not his intention. What they have started before I even became Padme’s handmaiden.” She said, trying to make it clear that the older Jedi didn’t do this out of any spite for his Padawan. “From what the Senator tells me, and from what I see, they are truly in love, and I respect that. Anakin, please find it in your heart to respect this yourself, and go on your own journey of self love. Being your own best friend is the greatest thing I ever learned growing up, it made it easy for me to transition through jobs and social situations, for I knew at the end I was always there for, well, me!” She said, trying to be cheerful at the end. Her cheeriness didn’t really work all that well, but she figured it was better than silence, or worse, crying from her end. By the end of her speech, Anakin was more composed, the angst gone from his eyes. All that was left was exhaustion. Nalia rubbed his arm caringly. “Get some sleep, introspect later.” She joked, although she was quite serious. 

Anakin nodded, having nothing else to say. She left the Jedi’s room quietly, slipping into her own. She allowed herself to make a quick cup of hot chocolate in her room before bed, savoring the flavor. Undressing and slipping under the warm covers, Nalia felt that things were going to go up from here. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, fyi I changed my username, so if anything seems different that's it :) 
> 
> I'm planning on three more chapters left, (yay!), I've learned a lot in the past two years of writing this and I apologize for any bad writing moments (oops, I'm still learning). Thank y'all for sticking with me and this story, for I wouldn't have been able to do it without you!

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction for this fandom, and the first time I wrote something in a couple years. I wanted to contribute to this semi-rare ship, I hope you enjoyed. Comments are welcome!


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